AITA? Famous Moments in Canadian History Judged by the Internet
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The Am I The A**hole subreddit has given humanity a framework for moral adjudication that historians simply did not have access to before now. We are correcting this oversight.
The following are real moments from Canadian history, presented in the AITA format, judged by the imagined internet with the benefit of hindsight and a comment section. All events are real. All verdicts are final.
AITA for stealing $18 million worth of maple syrup very slowly over several months? 🍁
The charge: Strategic syrup theft.
Canadian chaos level: 10/10. Sticky, slow, and somehow organized.
The situation: I work in a warehouse in Quebec that stores the strategic maple syrup reserve for the Federation of Quebec Maple Syrup Producers. Yes, this is real. Yes, there is a strategic maple syrup reserve.
Over the course of about a year, my associates and I siphoned approximately 3,000 tonnes of maple syrup from the barrels and replaced it with water so nobody would notice. We were discovered during a routine inventory check. Multiple people were arrested. I am asking for judgment.
Top comment: YTA obviously, but the audacity of replacing it with water and hoping nobody would check. Also the fact that you did this slowly over months. The commitment. The long game. I'm appalled and slightly impressed.
Second comment: INFO: did you taste it as you went? I feel like you must have tasted it as you went.
Verdict: YTA.
Final ruling: This is the most Canadian crime imaginable and we respect the craftsmanship.
AITA for doing a pirouette behind the Queen of England? 🩰
The charge: Unscheduled political ballet.
Canadian chaos level: Elegant, smug, and fully photographed.
The situation: I am Pierre Elliott Trudeau, Prime Minister of Canada. I was at Buckingham Palace in 1977 for a G7 summit photo opportunity. The Queen walked away. I did a spontaneous pirouette in the corridor behind her. A photographer caught it. It became one of the most famous photographs in Canadian political history.
Top comment: NTA. She didn't see it. You were having a moment. We all have moments. Yours was just photographed.
Second comment: The pirouette wasn't the problem. The smile is the problem. He knew exactly what he was doing.
Third comment: Honestly? Icon behaviour. NTA.
Verdict: NTA.
Final ruling: The pirouette was a gift to Canadian political history and we will not hear otherwise.
AITA for naming my child Newfoundland? 🏝️
The charge: Naming an entire country based on a misunderstanding.
Canadian chaos level: Historically significant failure to ask follow-up questions.
The situation: I am Jacques Cartier. I arrived on the coast of what I would come to call Canada in the 1530s. The local Haudenosaunee people pointed toward their village and said "kanata," meaning settlement. I assumed this was the name of the entire territory and wrote it on my maps. The second-largest country on earth is now named after the word for small village.
Top comment: YTA but honestly the audacity of just naming a whole country from one word you half heard. The energy of a man who does not ask follow-up questions.
Second comment: INFO: Did anyone correct you? Did you just keep going?
Third comment: He kept going.
Verdict: YTA.
Final ruling: But this is Canada now and we've grown attached.
AITA for selling electricity to Quebec for one dollar and locking in the rate until 2041? ⚡
The charge: Contract optimism with a 70-year hangover.
Canadian chaos level: Newfoundland feelings remain extremely valid.
The situation: I am Joey Smallwood, Premier of Newfoundland. In 1969 I signed an agreement to sell electricity from the Churchill Falls hydroelectric project in Labrador to Quebec at a fixed rate, locked in until 2041.
The rate made sense in 1969. By the 1990s, electricity prices had changed somewhat. Quebec is currently reselling the power at roughly ten times what they pay us for it. I would like to know if I was the a**hole.
Top comment: Joey. Buddy. YTA. Not because of bad intentions but because of the fixed rate until 2041 specifically. 2041. You locked in a fixed rate until 2041.
Second comment: This is the most expensive typo in Canadian history and it wasn't even a typo. He just agreed to it.
Third comment: Newfoundland really said "we'll do it for a dollar" and meant it for 70 years.
Verdict: YTA.
Final ruling: Newfoundland's feelings about this are valid and will remain valid until at least 2041.
AITA for going on strike the day the province introduced universal healthcare? 🏥
The charge: Standing between Canadians and healthcare history.
Canadian chaos level: The comment section has notes.
The situation: I am a Saskatchewan doctor in 1962. The provincial government just introduced the first universal single-payer healthcare plan in North America. Every doctor in the province, including me, went on strike for 23 days in protest.
We argued it would interfere with the doctor-patient relationship and represent government overreach. We lost. Saskatchewan kept the healthcare. Canada eventually adopted it nationally. It is now considered one of the country's defining institutions.
Top comment: YTA. I know you had concerns, but "we went on strike against the concept of universal healthcare" is not the legacy hill to die on.
Second comment: The audacity of doctors going on strike so that sick people would have fewer options. Think about this.
Third comment: History issued its verdict and it was YTA. The healthcare stayed.
Verdict: YTA.
Final ruling: The healthcare was correct. The strike was not.
AITA for refusing to change my town's name despite literally everyone telling me to? 🪧
The charge: Remaining Dildo, Newfoundland on purpose.
Canadian chaos level: Democracy in action, somehow.
The situation: I am the town of Dildo, Newfoundland. I have been offered the opportunity to change my name multiple times. I have declined every time. My residents are proud of the name. We elected our own honorary mayor. We lean into it at every opportunity. We are asked about the name constantly and we have decided this is fine, actually.
Top comment: NTA. The name has been there longer than the discomfort. Stand your ground, Dildo. Stand your ground.
Second comment: The fact that they voted on it. The community came together to decide to stay Dildo. Democracy in action.
Third comment: Dildo said "we will not be changing" and that is the most Newfoundland sentence I have ever read.
Verdict: NTA.
Final ruling: Dildo, Newfoundland is an icon and they know it.
AITA for selling the rights to Superman for $130 and then watching it become one of the most valuable IP on earth? 💙
The charge: A devastatingly bad deal.
Canadian chaos level: Historic heartbreak in a cape.
The situation: My name is Joe Shuster. I was born in Toronto. I co-created Superman with my writing partner Jerry Siegel. In the 1930s, we sold the rights to Detective Comics, later DC Comics, for $130. Superman has since generated billions of dollars in revenue. We received none of it. I would like the internet's assessment.
Top comment: NTA for selling it. You needed the money and you couldn't have known. The a**hole in this situation is the contract.
Second comment: $130. Sixty-five dollars each. For Superman. I need everyone to sit with this.
Third comment: There are monuments to lesser decisions. Joe Shuster deserved better and this is a fact.
Verdict: NTA.
Final ruling: The a**hole was the contract. We're sorry, Joe.
AITA for putting a hockey rink in my backyard and flooding it every night at midnight for fifteen years? 🏒
The charge: Extreme Canadian dad behaviour.
Canadian chaos level: Midnight hose work as a love language.
The situation: I am a Canadian dad. It is winter. I have a garden hose and a level-ish backyard and children who want to skate. I have been flooding the rink every night after the kids go to bed for fifteen consecutive winters.
My wife thinks this has gotten slightly out of hand. The rink has expanded twice. I bought a special attachment for the hose. I have opinions about ice temperature.
Top comment: NTA. This is Canadian parenting at its highest form. The rink is the love language.
Second comment: "Has gotten slightly out of hand" as though flooding a backyard in -15°C at midnight is out of hand. It is peak Canadian. It is in hand. It is exactly in hand.
Third comment: The children will talk about this rink for the rest of their lives. This man is a hero.
Verdict: NTA.
Final ruling: The backyard rink is a Canadian institution and your family will thank you.
Final Judgment 🍁
Overall verdict: Canada is guilty of being deeply weird, historically dramatic, and occasionally brilliant by accident.
Sentence: Continued national affection, with light roasting as required.
Canadian history is not always polite, tidy, or sensible. Sometimes it is a maple syrup heist. Sometimes it is a prime minister doing ballet behind royalty. Sometimes it is a town in Newfoundland refusing to rebrand because the bit is simply too strong.
The verdict is clear: messy, funny, occasionally questionable, and very much ours. 🍁
For the Canadian chaos historians 🍁
If this made you want to judge the entire country with affection, the Oh Canada collection has cute little Canadian things for people who love maple syrup drama, goose energy, hockey dads, and nationally specific nonsense.
Designed in Ontario, judging Canadian history with love. Shop the Oh Canada collection at paigepoutine.com 🍁